The mouth part of the face is the loudest part of the face.
If an old man trips and falls in a forest and no one is around to see it, is it still the funniest thing imaginable?
I think I would have been promoted much sooner if I had always worn this eye patch.
I wonder if when someone says you look like an angel they sometimes mean the angel of death and not one of those nice angels with wings.
Your worst day wearing a bear suit at work is still better than your best day at work without one.
The dumber you look, the fewer things people will ask you to do.
Great minds think alike. So do drunken carnies with corn dog sticks and the chance to shank you.