One man’s garbage is another man’s treasure. Unless you’re a raccoon. Then it’s basically all one category.
Pooping your pants is always an option, but it’s rarely the best option.
One day I’ll be dead and someone will find this website and say, “Wow! That guy was really stupid. Good thing he’s dead.”
Snake charming looks like a good way to earn some money, but most people overlook the high costs of snake bite antidote.
Some people say eating a large pizza by yourself is too much. I say mind your own business and leave me alone with my pizza.
It takes two to tango, but it takes only one to turn off the tango music and laugh at the two still doing the tango without music.
They say we all have our demons, but I decided I didn’t want to keep my demons around anymore so I sold them to a kid for five dollars.