If you don’t see a light at the end of the tunnel, you’re probably just in a cave.
An alpaca is the poor man’s unicorn.
If you’re a young cowboy today, I hope someday you’ll grow up to become a real man — not just another cowman.
I tried living in a house of cards once. The worst part was the soggy toilet.
A white rat is the poor man’s poodle.
Knapsack hobos are the only true hobos. Shopping cart hobos are just lazy normal people.
Do your best to make the world a better place and you can go to bed tonight knowing you fooled yourself into thinking you made a difference.
If department stores used hobos for mannequins, the hobos could get free clothes and the stores could save money on mannequin maintenance.
In a nutshell, you’ll find nut meat.
A man with a mustache is one thing. A man wearing a mustache and a beret must be stopped before he hurts any more children.