I could make more money if I worked more. But I’d rather make more money while not working at all.
Life is short — shouldn’t today be the day you finally pee on your boss’s chair?
I think I would have been promoted much sooner if I had always worn this eye patch.
Happiness is a choice. You can choose to eat right, exercise, and go to work today. Or you can choose to be happy.
Your worst day wearing a bear suit at work is still better than your best day at work without one.
You can always work harder at your job, but why bother if you aren’t going to get paid more too?
Work really hard every day and you might get promoted. Blackmail your boss and you will definitely get promoted.
The dumber you look, the fewer things people will ask you to do.
Life is short. You should try to spend more time working in a cubicle.
If you get paid by the hour, do your work slowly. If you pay your employees by the hour, fire the slow ones.